‘Cause you gotta have faith…

So, I’m back from Iraq and hoping to get some stability time Stateside before the Army decides to send me away from the family again.  Theresa has finished her physician assistant program at Duke and is heading to Officer Training School for the Air Force and I am attempting to go back to active duty Army from the Reserves, where I’ve spent the last couple of years.  I’m so proud of Theresa and how she was able to successfully complete something so academically ardous while running the household, rearing the kids, and dealing with the daily operations of a household while I’ve been gone for the last eighteen months.  It truly is a slap in the face to those who always told her she couldn’t do it because she “wasn’t smart enough”.  What kind of person says that about someone, much less to their face.   Anyway, I won’t get into it, because it’s a LONG story.

I have my packet and all required documents for a conditional release from the Reserves to go active duty again, only to be told that the Army is not accepting the ranks of E4 through E6 back on active duty from Reserve/National Guard/prior service status.  So, the recruiter in Raleigh never even said anything about it, letting me get the whole packet generated, signed, and notarized only to find out that it might be for naught.  What the hell?  Even the recruiter here in Florida was surprised that the Raleigh recruiter didn’t tell me.  So, I’m having to readjust my backup plans for this situation, if it doesn’t work out.  I need some prayers here, folks.  I have no idea how it is going to work out, but I have to have faith that I’m doing what I’m supposed to be in accordance with God’s direction for my life.

While taking a break/feeding the kids/getting out of the house this evening, I was listening to XM radio and heard a couple of stories about people being in situations similar to mine where they felt that they had perhaps taken a wrong turn in life or their careers only to find out that the difficult times were preparing them for the future.  I needed to hear that, and it took some of the frustration off of shoulders.  I get so wrapped up in making things work MY way, when I should be stepping back and looking at all of the angles of the situation and remaining positive that there is something good that will come of all of this.  I don’t mean to wax religious, but I was raised in a conservative Christian home and the things that I learned about my faith still stick with me, even when I least expect it to.  I say that because I feel that I am still doing what God wants me to do, but I’m not trusting in His plan enough to let go of the reins and let Him show me the directions to take.  There’s a country music hit that observes how the songwriter rushes around to get things done so much that life just is no fun.  Nothing seems to work right until he steps back and regroups and reviews his strategy and STOPS TRYING TO FORCE THINGS TO HAPPEN BEFORE THEY ARE REQUIRED TO HAPPEN.  That’s where I’m at right now.  Dan, step back, take a deep breath, realize that there are things in life that are beyond my control, and give the reins over to the One who knows what our tomorrows bring.

I’m thankful and indebted to my wife, Theresa, for the support she gives me.  She is also the one who continues to tell me that she is confident that I’ll find the right way to get to where I feel I need to be with my career.  She is my best friend and I know that she has my back.  I hope she knows that I have hers.  ALWAYS.  When you total the amount of time over the last ten years of our marriage, I have been gone for nearly seven of those years.  And, yet, she still supports me in my decisions.  She knows how much I enjoy what I do, both military and civilian careers.  And she always has an encouraging word when I need a little boost.

I am blessed to have such wonderful friends and fellow soldiers who have given me that shoulder to lean on, that ear for all of my bitching and moaning, that advice or perspective that I needed in order to refocus and regroup, and that camaraderie that is will last forever.  I can’t list them all here by name because it would take forever to do so, but you know who you are and you should know that I will do the same for you as you have done for me.

I’ll wrap up, but I just wanted to put this in black and white so that I could acknowledge the support and the love I’ve received from so many people.  It’s awesome and humbling, all at the same time.  From the very bottom of my heart, THANK YOU ALL!

You know who you are…



~ by kyodan75 on August 4, 2010.

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